i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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