Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
