i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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