Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
