JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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