Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
