My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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