Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize