Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
