I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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