The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
