Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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