they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize