My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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