ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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