Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
