you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize