they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
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