we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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