my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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