Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Anal astronaut?

(847): View more from Illinois

Wow word travels fast.

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(917): View more from New York City

Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.

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(712): View more from Iowa

I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga

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(863): View more from Florida

Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.

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(+27): View more from South Africa

Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"

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(703): View more from Virginia

Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience

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(937): View more from Ohio

Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.

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(940): View more from Texas

After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.

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(812): View more from Indiana

You fucked him, didn’t you?

(317): View more from Indiana

He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!

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