I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
