Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
pray to the hookup gods
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
