just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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