i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.