im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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