you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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