she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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