Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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