Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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