how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
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