I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
