? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm drive I can fine osifer
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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