Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize