Don't make out with my wife yet
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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