can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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