Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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