In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
