I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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