I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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