about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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