We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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