why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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