he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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