she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
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