he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
