batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
