awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize