I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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