More tranny stories later!
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
