I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
