just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize